Issue #2 How To ACTUALLY Cultivate Self Love

Hey!

Happy New Year! I hope this first week of January has treated you well. Remember this first week sets the tone for the rest of the year. If this week didn't go as you’d hoped/ you were sick (it’s going around), have compassion for yourself. Tomorrow is a new day. Set your intentions this evening, get clear on how you want this year to go, and make it happen!

Something that's been on my mind recently has been the idea of self-love. I struggled with the concept of self-love for the longest time. 

We’ve all experienced someone telling us to “just love yourself <3!!!” 

…girl. How tf am I supposed to “just love myself?! It’s not that easy. Like where do I start?

This term is thrown around so much, yet most of us still feel like half the time we have no clue how to achieve this “self-love” they speak of.

To me, self-love is all about self-acceptance, and learning to take care of yourself in the way you need to be cared for. I’ll write a future newsletter on self-acceptance, but today I want to focus on the second idea…

I want you to ask yourself, “what do I need in order to feel loved?”

We tend to look to others, to feel the love, validation, and attention which we seek, yet we don’t think to give these things to ourselves. The key to self love is to give yourself these things first. 

• If you're looking for someone else's attention, can you give yourself your undivided attention and presence? (no phones)
• If you're looking for support and encouragement, can you give yourself positive affirmations?
• If you want to feel security, can you create a safe and comfortable living space?
• If you want to feel special, can you buy yourself flowers? (I buy myself $5 flowers every time I grocery shop, it doesn't have to be expensive) 
• If you need validation, can you talk yourself through whatever you’re struggling with and validate yourself?
• If you want to feel taken care of, can you practice self care #justgirlythings

Journal on this question. Seriously go deep. Figure out what it is YOU NEED to feel love… And then give that to yourself. 

These examples I share are meant to show you that you don’t need someone else to give you what you need to feel the love you desire. At first it may feel weird. You may want to give up. You may get angry and think “NO I just want someone to give me these things, it’s too difficult or weird or annoying.”

These are the growing pains my friend. Keep practicing giving yourself the love you desire as much as humanly possible. Self love is meant to be a way of living, not an outcome to achieve. It gets easier, (and it gets fun) I promise.

Love, 

Maggie Mae